The Blessing of Health

Two weeks ago, I went with Dallin to a youth fireside at the church. My left eye hurt so bad and bugged me all night. I couldn't wait to get home and get my contacts out. My eye was very red in the outside corner. The following day, Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, I just hung around the house nursing my sore shoulder and my eye which I started to think had "pink eye." Tuesday I took a quick trip to QuickCare (it actually was quick too that day) and the P.A. that saw me gave me a prescription for my eye. I also had some bumps that were swelling along my left eyebrow and hairline under my bangs. She kind of wondered if I was reacting to a new hair product I had used for a few days and the eye just happened at the same time. I was feeling worse each day. By Thursday, I was much more swollen and new bumps were appearing in my hair just past my hairline. The rash was hurting too, not itching, just hurting. I finally decided to go back to the QuickCare and had Lance take me because I didn't feel like driving with my eye not feeling too good. I could still see fine, but I didn't feel alert. This time a P.A. agreed that my eye didn't look like pink eye and the rash was something to figure out. She went and got the head M.D. of the clinic to come look at me. He listened to my symptoms and asked a few questions and then said, "Well, you have a case of shingles." Oh. It is absolutely amazing that just putting a name to symptoms is a relief. It is nice to know what is going on with your body--and it's nice to know I'm not making it up! They immediately set-up an appointment 50 minutes later with an ophthalmologist. But the appointment was in Caldwell--the next town west of us. It would take about 40 minutes to get there. We made everything work out and let the boys know what was up. After seeing the ophthalmologist I started to get a better sense of how serious shingles in the eye can be. The 1st picture is Thursday, January 22nd.



Friday and Saturday were the worst days. The rash continued to swell and I was wiped out. I could barely open my eye on Saturday. The one thing about having a visible case of the shingles is that my boys could see how much it affected me. I got several comments like, "You look scary." "You don't feel good." "That looks really bad." And they were all so good at letting me sleep, doing the dishes and making meals. I feel very loved by the care that all of the boys gave me. Sunday I didn't have any new sores. Yeah! By midweek last week the blisters were pretty much scabbing over and I was starting to feel so much better. Then, of course, I picked up the cold my boys have had. Hunter and Thayne had each spent a day at home with it. Now Bruce and Luke have it too. It doesn't last too long though.


Second picture is Friday, January 23.



The worst day, Saturday, Jan. 24.


I saw the eye doctor again on Friday, Jan. 30th. I got more medicine to take for a month now and eye drops to use for 5 days. The redness if finally going away. I have felt pretty good and Friday and Saturday. But I over did it yesterday, so I was glad it is Sunday today.

I think at the beginning of January as Lance started his own company, we changed health insurance to an affordable monthly HSA plan (that means huge deductible), and we knew that January would be a tight month, I remember fasting and asking for the blessing of health this year. We have money saved in our HSA, but I really don't want to spend it--having savings is such a security for me. It was soooo hard to decide to go to the doctor because of the money part--even though it is there for that. (I hate spending money in general. I'm a natural saver.) As I've contemplated the situation and as I remembered the struggles and trials of several people: my friend that had cancer and my aunt that is going through it now; my cousin, David and his wife, Heather, who was in a coma and is continuing to recover; and of another cousin, Jennifer that just lost a sweet baby after a few precious hours of life, I realize that the Lord has many ways of blessing us. The trial of illnesses reminds me of how "feeling well" effects a person's life and abilities. I have much more compassion for someone suffering chronic pain. The biggest lesson to me though has been of faith.

Shingles is caused by the chicken pox virus that lives in your body after you have had chicken pox. It can become active in the form of shingles anytime during your life, but it is most common in adults over the age of 60. The percentage of cases each year of 30-39 year old having shingles is only 2% of the cases. Fifty percent of adults will have a experienced shingles in their lifetime. (The other 50% must have some other trial!) So this is were my trial in faith comes in. Stress is one of the factors that can lead to an out break of shingles. The whole thing of having to have doctor bills goes back to me learning to have faith in and rely on the Lord.

I knew that starting a business would be hard at this time, but I also know we have been prepared for this experience. It is hard. We are having to work together and plan together: expenses, use of the van, Lance working at home, the care of children, etc. I can't even say this is the major part of my stress either. I have a tendency to make goals mentally (not even written down--just stress out about in my head!) and try to have everything going at the beginning of a new year--the typical stuff:

Be better at

• scripture study
• praying
• keeping the house clean
• having the laundry done
• exercise four times a week
• be more organized and effective in my calling
• pay more attention to my children
• be a better piano/flute teacher
• get my students ready for festival
• learn all the accompaniment pieces for my flute students' pieces
• break the news to the parents of the students that the book they need for festival is another $20 for that month
• finish coordinating the 50th Anniversary dinner for Nampa Musicale
• get decorations for the dinner
• finish every project or craft I've ever started
• take junk to D.I.
• put good junk on Craig's list
• get rid of three kittens
• lose the last 15 pounds I want to lose
• eat better
• record all the calories it eat everyday
  
• and the list goes on and on (does this sound like anyone else's list? I bet it does.)
  

Then I lay around for two weeks and life goes on and I don't feel guilty about not working on that huge mental list. I know I need to let my body mend. My boys still had clean clothes to wear to school everyday, they all ate, Lance shopped for milk and bread, we all ate meals, I finished First Nephi, finished the book North and South that I had been reading for two months (it's up there with Pride and Prejudice), still taught lessons-my students are doing pretty well at learning their pieces, the Musicale dinner was fabulous and a friend hugely helped with collecting decorations and the shopping for them, my visiting teacher brought us dinner one night & it was a night we really truly appreciated not having to put it together ourselves, I've had more snuggle times with my boys, Lance has been "almost frantic" at work a few times with calls coming in and putting out proposals for contracts, etc. It has been a blessing to have a few weeks to breath and refocus my faith that "as we keep the commandments we will be blessed to prosper in the land." There are better days ahead, but joy and blessings can still be found through the days of our afflictions--what ever afflictions the Lord sees fit to give us at that time. Without them I would see very little growth in my life, so I'm thankful for them. I am also very grateful for the blessing of health. You have to experience sickness in order to find the joy in health.

Feeling much better: Saturday, Jan 31st.
Yeah for bangs!